We’ve always expressed concern about stalking behaviour and follow the press looking for new examples of toxic behaviour and succesful resolution. Several of our readers have experienced first hand how the Police have treated them when their neighbours and colleagues have turned out to be toxic and controlling. We are regularly contacted by people who have read our accounts of toxic behaviour and agree that it is a topic that the police are reluctant to manage or deal with. None of the police we have heard of, involved in any “intervention” have demonstrated any idea how to deal with the characterisitics displayed by stalkers. “It’s not our problem guv’nor”.
Studying police responses we wrote about DARVO here which is how stalkers and bullies behave when confronted. One of our case studies talks about successfully prosecuting a stalker only after two assaults and 60 plus reports to Kent Police. Then the case was only taken to court by the CPS after his lying was exposed and the victim assaulted. During that experience we were lucky to have documented each episode of a toxic mindset, repeatedly hiding behind a trumped up dispute and using it to divert police attention away from his criminal behaviour (harrassment under the Freedom from Harrassment Act of 2012) and into a civil matter. We were surprised, (nay, gobsmacked) that none of the sixty visits by Kent Police he recorded, to incidents this stalking neighbour perpetrated resulted in a proper investigation. All recorded before being dropped. Eventually on our advice the case was concluded by the victim. We have shared that experience with people who have contacted us in the hope that they can also resolve the matter for the sake of their own health and enabling them to move on. We documented their experience also and noted similar results. Today at https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-63745857 the BBC announces a stalking super – complaint aimed at focusing the Police’s attention to the behaviour. We can only add our collective experience to the need for the Police to get a grip.
Of course, not all stalking behaviour ends in murder, but victims none the less are damaged by prolonged exposure to toxic behaviour. Perpetrators are emboldened by lack of closure and in our experience will escalate to assault if challenged. We therefore will be following this super complaint and advise readers experiencing any stalking behaviour which is fixated on them, and who subsequently have their reports to the police trivialised and shut down, to get in touch with the organisers of the super complaint.