We’ve always expressed concern about stalking behaviour and follow the press looking for new examples of toxic behaviour and succesful resolution. Several of our readers have experienced first hand how the Police have treated them when their neighbours and colleagues have turned out to be toxic and controlling. We are regularly contacted by people who have read our accounts of toxic behaviour and agree that it is a topic that the police are reluctant to manage or deal with. None of the police we have heard of, involved in any “intervention” have demonstrated any idea how to deal with the characterisitics displayed by stalkers. “It’s not our problem guv’nor”.
Studying police responses we wrote about DARVO here which is how stalkers and bullies behave when confronted. One of our case studies talks about successfully prosecuting a stalker, only after two assaults and 60 plus reports to Kent Police. Then the case was only taken to court by the CPS after his lying was exposed and the victim assaulted. During that experience we were lucky to have documented each episode of a toxic mindset, repeatedly hiding behind a trumped up dispute and using it to divert police attention away from his criminal behaviour (harrassment under the Freedom from Harrassment Act of 2012 et al) and into a civil matter. We were surprised, (nay, gobsmacked) that none of the sixty visits by Kent Police this victim recorded, to incidents this stalking neighbour perpetrated, resulted in a proper investigation. All incidents were recorded on a seperate incident reporting system to the main police log, before being dropped. Eventually on our advice the case was concluded by the victim. We have shared that experience with people who have contacted us in the hope that they can also resolve the matter for the sake of their own health and enabling them to move on. We documented their experience also and noted similar results concluding that the police have too much choice when it comes to supporting people in communities.
In our experience, the report by Megan Agnew printed in the Times on 5th December 2022 is typical of how stalking victims are treated by the police. Her story documents how London Gynaecologist Dr Marie Gerval had to take her own stalker to court. We think this is policing on the cheap, unacceptable after the government election manifesto claimed that it was the party of law and order. What we’ve experienced is wilful lawlessness and exploitation by a cheap government for the purpose of gaining votes and impressing its backers.
On 25th November 2022 at https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-63745857 the BBC announced a stalking super – complaint aimed at focusing the Police’s attention to the behaviour. We can only add our collective experience to the need for the Police to get a grip. (They will tell you they don’t have resources).
Of course, not all stalking behaviour ends in murder, but victims none the less are damaged by prolonged exposure to toxic behaviour. Perpetrators are emboldened by lack of closure and in our experience will escalate to assault if challenged. We therefore will be following this super complaint and advise readers experiencing any stalking behaviour which is fixated on them, and who subsequently have their reports to the police trivialised and shut down, to get in touch with the organisers of the super complaint. The Suzy Lamplugh Trust